Joel's Story

“Where did you get the money to buy all of that?” I asked Joel. (Not his real name) He appeared to be so proud to have spent his money for other children. He replied, “Oh, Grandma gave it to me.” Of course, I reminded him that he had spent all of the money Grandma gave him, except seven cents. Then he expressed hostility, belligerence, and maintaining that he had not stolen again. Later this was followed by an admission of guilt, though there seemed to be no remorse-only resentment and anger. Joel apologized to the children only from duty, but, still remained sullen and brusque. He even remained aloof after returning home.

Joel’s voice quivered a little as he read aloud from Psalm 51 near bedtime. After he completed the chapter I talked to him about how God forgave David for murder as well as other sins. I reminded him that David’s sin, my sin, or his own sin doesn’t stop God from loving us. And we discussed that admitting our sin and turning from it brings God’s forgiveness. And we talked how that murder seems so much worse to us than stealing. But, in God’s eyes they are both sin, and both can be forgiven. Then Joel said, “I guess I will just always steal, because I can’t quit.”

Tears flowed unchecked down Joel’s cheeks as well as my own as he told me that the stealing started when he was seven years old. He told of having scars from the abuse he suffered through his younger years. The hurt was visible in his face as he relived those experiences. The stealing started as a way of expressing the anguish of feeling unloved and rejected, but had taken over his life until he doesn’t control it anymore, it controls him.

The admission from Joel of his inability to stop stealing brought tears to my eyes, and joy to my heart. Why the joy? Because when we can admit our helplessness, then God can start working His miracle of change in us that His word talks about in Philippians 1:6. This miracle has begun in Joel’s heart. And I believe we will see the progress as he grows in Christ.

It’s an awesome thing to be a part of God performing or completing the good work He began in a child’s life. And though Joel doesn’t know what his future holds. He is learning that being imperfect doesn’t mean being unloved by God.  And, that regardless of what background we come from, we can change. I'm thankful to be a small part of  helping Joel and other children to grow into the men and women who will carry the torch that was lit by Bro. Montgomery in 1953 when Tupelo Children’s Mansion was started.